Summer Flings: Sun, Sea, and Love

Summer is a special time in our lives. The warmth, the sea, the sun, and the carefree atmosphere draw us in. It seems like everything is easier and simpler during this season. For those without a partner, summer vacation becomes the perfect time for a romance. But what are our expectations from this vacation, from ourselves, and from our potential partners? And are these expectations destined to come true?

The Allure of Vacation

The very word “vacation” hints at a time to let ourselves go. It’s a break from our tight schedules, work obligations, and household chores. We seek to enjoy freedom, indulge our sensuality, and embrace spontaneity. Our daily routines often leave little room for experiments. During vacation, however, our roles simplify to the basics: “I am a woman” or “I am a man.” This simplicity, combined with the excitement of new places and people, allows us to shed our usual responsibilities and explore new facets of ourselves.

Setting Vacation Goals

Before embarking on a vacation, it’s crucial to understand our goals. These can be broadly divided into non-romantic and romantic categories. Non-romantic goals include resting, sleeping in, improving health, immersing ourselves in books and contemplation, and exploring new places. In this context, vacation serves as a “treatment” for the soul and body. Pursuing non-romantic goals means we are less likely to notice potential partners, as we are more focused on our inner selves.

Romantic goals, on the other hand, involve new acquaintances, flirting, coquetry, falling in love, and sex. A romantic vacation is not a “treatment” but a “cosmetic procedure” with a bright, yet temporary effect. It’s essential to understand the extent of intimacy we desire and are comfortable with. Otherwise, we risk unmet expectations and shattered hopes. A successful vacation is not just about physical rest but also about new, pleasant experiences that we bring back with us.

Hygiene and Safety

If your vacation plans include intimate encounters, ensure you are prepared. Pack protection and don’t rely on your partner to provide it. Avoid reckless actions like succumbing to peer pressure or making decisions under the influence of alcohol. Such behavior often leads to regret, guilt, and resentment.

Psychological Protection

Interestingly, statistics show that 90% of both men and women know that a vacation fling ends when the vacation does. Yet, parting ways is often painful. A vacation romance can be compared to fast food: enjoyable but potentially harmful if not approached critically.

The main danger of a vacation romance is the “rose-colored glasses” effect. In a state of relaxation and euphoria, it’s challenging to accurately assess our partner’s character and moral qualities. The thought that this person might be “the one” can be deceptive. Remind yourself that romantic walks, sweet words under the moonlight, and even sex are not reasons to rush into a lifelong commitment.

Maintain your boundaries and avoid oversharing. Not only is it unsafe, but vacation is a time for lightness, not for delving into life’s complexities and problems.

Embrace the Experience

Remember that vacation life has its beginning and end. Don’t burden yourself or your partner with expectations. A brief adventure can remain just that—a pleasant memory. Eventually, you’ll return to reality, and your vacation partner doesn’t have to be part of it.

A vacation fling, when not burdened with excessive expectations and when safety measures are observed, can be a valuable experience. It can boost your energy and confidence. If you notice that flirting and coquetry improve your mood and make you feel more free, why not bring this experience back home? Visit pleasant places in your city, gather with friends in cafes, or explore museums and cinemas.

Feeling sad when parting with a beloved place or people is natural. It reflects your ability to be grateful. Don’t fight this feeling; experience it fully. Understand what you are truly missing—the person or the feelings they evoked. Perhaps you are mourning the inability to fully realize the qualities you suppressed in your everyday life.

Returning home, we carry not just memories of our vacation companions but also of who we were with them. We bring back knowledge of what helped us be that way and the feelings we experienced. This experience, once integrated into our daily lives, can make our reality different from what it was before the vacation romance.

For further reading, check out this guide to vacation romances.