Unexpected Joys: The Realities of Raising Multiple Children

Our heroes are fathers of many children. They share how they manage with three or four kids, their dreams for their children and themselves, and reveal some parenting secrets.

Sergey Savchuk, Father of Three

“I adhere to three principles: fairness, honesty, and keeping my promises”

Our family leads a quite active lifestyle: we walk a lot and travel. We enjoy visiting new interesting places and often go to children’s centers or cafes. People around us are often surprised at how we manage to do everything with three children!

I can’t say that I am a strict father. I rarely punish my children, only for significant misbehavior. After that, I always feel very upset. Therefore, my wife and I try to find common ground with our kids and negotiate. If there is any problem or difficult situation, we always try to resolve it calmly and quietly.

Looking at my children, I feel boundless love and pride. Seeing their achievements brings me great joy.

I adhere to three main principles in parenting: fairness, honesty, and keeping my promises. For a child to be honest with you, you must also be honest with them. When parents keep their agreements with children, they grow up to be responsible and diligent people.

Dmitry Samusenko, Father of Four

“After work, I always hurry home to spend more time with my loved ones”

Our day starts quite simply: if possible, I wake up first, make coffee for my wife, and cocoa for the kids. Recently, since we have a first-grader, we decided to discipline him—on weekday mornings, he does exercises. I think this sets him up for a productive day. After that, everyone goes about their business.

It’s very pleasant when the children call and ask how I am doing at work. Now the youngest does this more often; he recently got a phone and enjoys it very much.

After work, I always hurry home to spend more time with my loved ones. The older children, of course, live their own lives: they want to go for walks and work somewhere to make life easier for us. Parents are not very interesting to them anymore, but we don’t blame them for this. We often gather in the evening for dinner and spend this time together.

I love watching the facial expressions and behavior of my children. They do something, and I think to myself: “I used to do the same thing in my childhood.” When you realize that you have common traits, it warms your heart.

I can’t call myself a strict father; I am rather impulsive. Sometimes I punish the children and then realize that I could have acted differently. But I think it’s acceptable for parents. With the wisdom of lived years, adults can occasionally manipulate children to teach them something.

My wife and I try to instill in our children respect for elders, teach them not to lie, and to be responsible for their actions. We always say: “Put yourself in the shoes of the person you offended—then you will understand how badly you acted.”

Anton Martoplyas, Father of Four

“The main thing is not to lose heart”

In fact, we didn’t plan to have so many children. When I met my wife, I told her that we wouldn’t have children until we had an apartment, a car, and enough money. Half a year passed—and now we’ve been together for 16 years!

Sometimes I think I’m a rather foolish father and not strict at all! (laughs) I treat my children the way I would like them to treat me and others. I believe that using force against a child is meaningless, so the worst punishment for my son is when I turn off his Wi-Fi! But I always try to focus more on dialogue and the opportunity to explain why it’s necessary to do something one way and not another. Mom, of course, tries to scare them, saying, “Dad will come and deal with you!” but Dad always allows everything because he is often absent. As a result, I am the good one, and she is the bad one! (laughs)

I never demanded high grades from my children at school, but instead, I always ask them to fix the situations they find themselves in. It doesn’t matter if it’s a bad grade or not—the main thing is not to lose heart, try to correct their mistakes, and learn a lesson from it. I want them to grow up honest with themselves.

Sergey Segan, Father of Four

“I am incredibly grateful to my wife for her patience and boundless love”

I was born into a family with two children and never thought I would become the father of many children. I always thought that having many children in a family was very difficult. Now I have a different opinion. If you could only see how my children greet me when I return from work! The joy they feel brings me immense happiness!

In my family, there are two girls and two boys, all two years apart in age. I love watching them: each is individual and cute in their own way, but all are equally dear to me.

I am not a strict father; if I get angry, I calm down quickly. It is very important to me that my children find their place in life and are happy, so I try to send them to clubs and sections, considering their wishes.

Our favorite joint activity is going to the dacha. Recently, we picked up a puppy at a gas station, so the kids’ desire to go there has increased even more! Of course, I am incredibly grateful to my wife for her patience and boundless love—we are not from Minsk, and grandparents live far away, so to cope with small children, you need strong nerves.

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