9 Simple Habits to Become Strong and Independent

Being strong and independent is not easy, especially if you’re used to relying on others, have never faced life’s challenges, or lack self-confidence. Independence isn’t just about refusing help from others; it’s about cultivating essential qualities and changing your worldview. Here are 9 simple habits that can help you develop your inner strength and independence.

1. Earn More Money

Money isn’t everything, but it paves the way to freedom and independence. Once you achieve financial stability, you won’t have to depend on anyone else’s help or support—neither from your parents nor your partner. If you can’t work a 9-to-5 job due to studies or household duties, find a part-time job. It’s a great way to earn money for your personal needs. If you’re already working but still don’t feel free, it might be time to look for a new job that pays better.

2. Say “I” Instead of “We”

Teamwork is crucial in a marriage or serious relationship as it helps build a strong bond. However, independence is just as important. If one partner constantly carries the other, happiness will be elusive. You’ll become a burden to each other, and it’s unfair and counterproductive to dump your problems on someone else. While support helps you through tough times, independence makes life easier and allows both of you to move forward. Give your partner personal space and focus on your own activities. Enjoy the fact that you can do many things on your own. This will help you mature and make your relationship more balanced.

3. Solve Your Problems Independently

Psychologists suggest a useful exercise for those who struggle with their own difficulties: treat every problem as a secret you don’t want to share with anyone. This will help you stop depending on others, even when you feel like the ground is crumbling beneath your feet. If you can solve something on your own, do it and take control of the situation. Ask for help only when you’ve exhausted all other options. There’s nothing wrong with seeking help, but don’t make it a habit. Otherwise, you’ll never become self-sufficient enough to live your own life.

4. Set Realistic Goals

Being realistic is a great habit that fosters independence. Instead of telling yourself, “I’ll make a million this year,” set a less ambitious but more achievable goal, such as, “I’ll save 20% of my salary this month.” The easier it is to achieve your initial goals, the simpler it will be to adapt to a new lifestyle where you succeed without relying on others. Gradually set larger goals, but remember that achieving them depends solely on you and your hard work.

5. Accept That Dependency is Natural

Success brings confidence and a sense of self-worth, which are fertile grounds for independence. If you’ve achieved something, you might feel like you don’t need support. But when you falter, you’ll find yourself depending on attention, care, and comfort. In other words, independence brings a new kind of dependency. However, this isn’t necessarily bad. Life is full of ups and downs. You should learn to handle failures independently without becoming a burden to your loved ones. To be truly independent, you need to take responsibility for your failures and learn to rectify them.

6. Stand Up for Your Ideals

Being independent means standing your ground, especially when it comes to your values and ideals. In most cases, children depend on their parents, spouses on each other, and friends on their friends because they share the same views on life. If you depend on your surroundings for approval and support, you might easily compromise your beliefs without even realizing it. If you’re strong enough to stand your ground, think outside the box, and challenge what’s considered “normal,” you’ll achieve intellectual, emotional, and physical independence in no time.

7. Expand Your Social Circle

It’s simple math: the more friends you have, the less you depend on any one of them. Constantly expanding your social circle gives you the opportunity to meet new people and spend time and energy getting to know them better. This allows your close friends and family to “rest” from the fact that you’re codependent. The more friends you have, the more opportunities you’ll have to be in places you’ve never been and do things you’re not used to. This way, you become more mature, versatile, and independent.

8. Live Alone

Living alone is the ultimate test of strength that can help you grow up. Living in your parents’ house is comfortable, but taking responsibility for your own household can give you the potential for growth and development. Earning, doing laundry, cleaning, cooking, and spending time with yourself will only strengthen your independence. If you’re in your twenties and still living like a schoolgirl, it’s time to reconsider your views on the world, set realistic goals, and take a big, bold step—move out.

9. Ask for Help Without Becoming Dependent

Asking for help is perfectly normal since we live in a society and can’t completely isolate ourselves from it. However, it’s crucial to learn how to ask for help without losing your independence. There’s a high chance that you ask for help not because you’ve tried all other options, but because you don’t fully realize your potential. It’s easy to stop trying to solve things on your own when you know someone else will cover for you. If you try to solve every difficult situation on your own before asking for help, you’ll see what it takes to achieve real success. Living like a lone wolf and handling everything on your own will show you how strong you truly are. Ultimately, independence reflects how confident you are in yourself and your abilities. It also includes self-love and healthy self-esteem. The stronger your feelings for yourself, the freer and more independent you are. Be confident that you don’t need others’ approval or constant support to live your life happily.

For further reading, check out this article on being strong and independent.